Chapter Seven:
HANDS ACROSS THE SEA

The Big Apple lived up to it's reputation. The hotel was big and busy and just off Times Square . The kids at 14 and 15 were fearless and eager for adventure - and in a funny sort of way so were Malc and I. We'd been writing regularly to three people who were all members of this EULENSPIEGEL SOCIETY and also to the man who published THE RIGID BONDAGE ROSTER, so when they all knew we were coming the offers of hospitality were overwhelming. “Come and see our Playroom”, “We've got a guest apartment in our house”, “Will you give a talk at the weekly Meeting?” But it was essentially a family holiday so we declined all offers except that we said we would like to be at the regular meeting of the EULENSPIEGEL SM GROUP if there was one while we were in town. There was and it was arranged for Vera to take the kids to see the play DRACULA on Broadway (their choice, not ours) and off we went to meet “Rose and Dick” who we already felt we knew. Ron, the man from THE RIGID BONDAGE ROSTER was to join us along with a Professor from City College who lectured on Fine Art and had a fully equipped dungeon in his basement. They were to buy us dinner and then escort us to the meeting. I thought I'd be nervous but we'd all exchanged so many intimate letters it was like meeting old friends. They took us to eat in Greenwich Village and the table conversation ranged from SM Night Clubs to where to buy a leather strait-jacket, and nobody even bothered to lower their voices. The sense of freedom was something I found difficult to get used to.

Then, walking into that little hall where EULENSPIEGEL met was somehow like coming home. A wonderful mix of misfits who'd found one another and although they were all into different things they were comfortable with one another: From city and suburb; straight, gay, lesbian; couples and singles. No strict dress code so we didn't feel at all out of place in our tourist clothes. There were some in full leather or fetish dress, even two transvestites or trans-sexuals (I didn't know the difference then). Anyway, we were made to feel completely at home because it was actually homely. I'm not being wicked but the atmosphere wasn't much different to our local parish church social ... except for the topics of conversation of course. There was coffee and biscuits and the sales table was piled high with pamphlets, information sheets and publications (many of which we'd never heard). Rose and Dick knew most of the people and we were introduced informally around the room. People asked what we were “into” ... and we hadn't actually got a pat answer. They were amazed we hadn't brought any photographs of the games we play. We'd never thought of taking pictures of us in action ... in fact I thought it was quite a kinky idea. We discovered that a lot of people there had photos in their wallets of themselves dressed up or tied up. They handed them around like showing photographs of their children or holidays; common currency, communication. We felt completely relaxed as people gossiped together as more people arrived and the official meeting was ready to start.

A fabulous lady of about my age and build who was a lecturer in Social Psychology introduced herself and gave us her business card. She invited us to come meet students in her 'Human Sexuality' course and talk to them about marital S&M in Great Britain . We said we had our kids and my mother in tow. “Oh, I'll get somebody to take them on a boat trip up the Hudson for a day” she says. “My students would love to meet you. Last week we had a professional New York SM Call Girl give a talk. She was a lot of fun.”

Then there was Donna, a sexy but tough looking gal in full leather (although it was ever so warm that night) who asked if we'd ever been to San Francisco . “That's where it was all at” she announced. She told us that she was employed as a sex Counselor at a big hospital there, had helped found “DYKES ON BIKES” the all female motorcycle club and, as a hobby she made the best whips in the USA . We saw DUNGEONMASTER magazine for the first time and bought all the back issues of it and RIGID BONDAGE ROSTER. A very masculine man in boots and motorcycle jacket introduced himself to Malcolm and said he was a member of the Gay Male SM Activist's group (G.M.S.M.A.) and would Malc like to go to a meeting as his guest? Malc looked panic stricken. He'd grown out of thinking of all homosexuals as limp wristed pansies but this hunk looked like he could beat Malc in the wrestling or boxing ring. I speculated on the thought of Malc being overpowered by two very macho homosexuals ... but from there on I didn't pursue that fantasy. But I did buy a couple of issues of the gay magazine DRUMMER which specializes in photos and fiction about muscular men in leather and chains. The theme of the issue was “Hot'n'heavy Mansex”. I thought that'll make interesting reading after we get home.

The Speaker for the evening was an expert on whipping techniques. He demonstrated various types of whips on several willing acquaintances of both sexes. We were impressed by his insistence on safety, hygiene, precision and total responsibility (Mutual consent seemed to be taken for granted). These strict rules & established etiquette were new to Malc and me. The rules are clearly defined and generally observed among the 'in crowd'. Prescribed codes of conduct are even written down and published in magazines in American, Sweden and Germany ... it's just that all those publications are banned in the UK , so we found we were horribly ignorant at that time.

This lecture demonstration was part of a series. Other topics listed for forthcoming meetings were restraint as a sensual experience without SM titled “The Gentle Art of Bondage', “Pins & Needles” (which was piercing and tattoos as Art and Eroticism), “Masks, Hoods and Helmets in Fantasy Enhancement” and 'Military Interrogation Techniques, including demonstrations of electro-torture with muscle stimulators, vibrators, cattle prods, violet wands and hand-cranked generators”. I slipped a copy of the list to Malcolm and as he read it the bulge in his crotch got noticeably bigger.

After the main talk and coffee the crowd of about sixty split up into smaller groups each discussing a different topic or sexual preference. Rose and Dick were leading a 'Talkshop' about enemas which didn't appeal to us much, so we sat in on 'Inferno 79'; the dishy young leatherman talking informally about the recent annual meeting of the Chicago Hellfire Club. 'Inferno' each year is a gay leather/SM/bondage get together for four days. 200 men into every kind of 'Heavy Mansex' he explained, “It's a learning experience as well as having a great time”. The slides were incredible; flogging and electro torture workshops with demonstrators working on willing victims and surrounded by crowds of observers; a Slave Training session by a well-known Master; a freestyle bondage competition. Men aged 21 to 72 at the equivalent of a Boy's Camp in the wilds of the Mid-West doing their own thing in public in the privacy of an enclosed campsite. Apparently it's by invitation only and always oversubscribed. Malc bought the illustrated souvenir program for the previous year ... and picked up membership details!

I'd wandered over to a group to which a middle-aged Jewish housewife was demonstrating 'Nipple Torture'. I gathered she was generally known as Rosie the Tit Lady, who sat at home in Brooklyn modifying all types of bulldog clips, alligator clips and anything that would grab, grip, nip or tweak as she put it. I moved hastily on to join Malc at 'Bondage for Beginners' where we didn't learn anything. But it was a massive breakthrough for us both. Sixty men and women responsible and intellectually alive, sharing ideas with the specified, publicly advertised aim of promoting SAFE, SANE AND LOVING S&M.

END CHAPTER 7

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